A tale of layoffs, emotional chaos, and an impossible love story
You ever have a crush so random, so wildly inconsistent, that you start to think maybe your nervous system is using it like a mood ring? Because that’s where I’m at – with Pedro Pascal.
My feelings for him have been coming and going like my motivation to finish an online course. Some days, I’m like “He’s the one.” Other days, I’m like “Honestly, I think I’m over it. I’m too emotionally exhausted to romanticize anyone right now.” And then – like a glitch in the matrix – I’ll see a photo of him with stains on his pants, and suddenly I’m kicking my feet like an 80’s adult at a Backstreet Boys concert.
Let me explain.
Right now, I’m going through it. I just got laid off, my emotions are all over the place, and every day feels like a weird combo of disassociation and high-functioning spiraling. My usual crushes (shoutout to the math bearded king) haven’t been hitting the same lately, which made me feel… weirdly blank. Not empty, just… blank. Like a whiteboard someone wiped clean but forgot to write anything new on.
And then – I see it.
A photo of Pedro Pascal, looking cool and unbothered, with literal stains on his pants. Like he just spilled coffee, kept it moving, and still had the audacity to look good doing it. And suddenly, my crush was back on like someone flipped a light switch in my brain labeled “delusion, but comforting.”
And what’s wild is… I get it. Because lately I’ve become that adult who can’t eat anything without it ending up on my shirt. Every time. Doesn’t matter if it’s cereal or pasta or an emotional support cookie. I’ll walk around all day thinking I look cute, only to get home and see a splotch of sadness sauce on my clothes. So naturally, seeing Pedro also wearing his snack battle scars made me think, Wait… is this a sign? Are we soulmates?
Listen, I know this crush is probably 98% emotional chaos and 2% actual admiration, but that 2% is really hanging on. And sometimes, when you’re riding the waves of uncertainty – whether it’s career stuff, existential spirals, or the trauma of Hot Cheetos dust – you need something a little ridiculous to smile about.
So yeah, my love for Pedro Pascal is currently back in the “on” position. We’ll see where it’s at tomorrow. It might get replaced by a crush on some guy at a coffee shop who calls me by name, that’s usually where my crushes come from. Or not. Maybe I’ll just keep wearing my food stains like a badge of honor and wait for Pedro to do the same again.
Because if we both show up to the same place with matching pasta sauce splatters… that’s destiny, baby.
🍝
Love, Loops